Sora's Activity Logs
by fitz88
Summary: First bokutomo fic yes! A small prologue-fic with Yozora as the main char. Contains SPOILERS though.
1. Chapter 1

**YEY FIRST! Hahaha… here's a small fic about Yozora that I hope you'd like. If you're reading the manga only then I warn you… This fic contains SPOILERS… so I apologize in advance to the peeps who had no idea, or didn't want to know… Anyway… Im writing this in an attempt to understand how… Yozora became Yozora… demon bitch extraordinaire! R n R please :D**

**PS – I don't own shit. Some of the things here are based on the lightnovels and summaries from seanver (which for some reason, I can no longer find D:). This chap is pure fanfic, but Sora wearing a dress and not meeting with Taka did happen. Again, SPOILERS!**

She stood in front of the mirror, staring awkwardly at the stranger in front of her.

She wore a plain white spaghetti strap blouse, a sky blue skirt with a little ruffle at the edges, pink sandals and a small red hairpin.

She looked adorable, cute, pretty. A dozen other compliments could come to mind, but not one gave her comfort.

She shrewdly studied her reflection, looking for any sign of imperfection. Was her hair too short? Does she look pale? Do her knees look too skinny?

She frowned, giving herself her best look of disapproval. She wasn't vain, far from it; she was just making sure she looked okay. That's all.

She was being silly - stupid really - worrying about what to wear, how she looked. It wasn't like her. What was so bad about wearing plain cargo shorts and T-shirts? What's wrong with wearing baseball caps?

She stood still for another minute, her thoughts flying. She sighed, shook her head, and decided to head towards her bed.

She threw herself face first on her pillow, muffling her groans of frustration.

Appearance, clothes, looks; none of it really mattered to her before. It wasn't that she took no care in her clothes; she just didn't pay that much attention. She always preferred wearing clothes that were easy to move in, clothes that felt comfortable to her. For some reason, skirts and blouses were not on that list.

So why was she wearing them now?

Because it would make him notice. Because it would make him ask. Because it would help her send her message across.

She didn't mean to deceive him, it wasn't really her intention. But one thing had led to another, and it became difficult for her to admit to him the truth.

He thought her a boy, and she had done nothing to correct him.

She grabbed her pillow and started punching it violently, trying to vent out.

"Taka you idiot!"

She didn't think it was really that important to be honest with him. They enjoyed each other's company, they played together, hung out together, talked, they were friends, and her gender wouldn't change that… shouldn't change that...

But then he had made her heart skip, he had made her smile, made her laugh. He had made her feel important, wanted…

Now she wanted him to know everything, she wanted to hang out with him more, to play with him more, but this time, as her true self.

She was scared though. What if he started hating her? What if he didn't like girls? What if he found them annoying?

_I'll treasure Sora as much as 100 people, even if the entire world becomes your enemy, ill still stay your friend._

He'd told her that, and she believed him. But he said that while thinking she was a boy. Would it change once he found out she was a girl?

She took her blanket and hid under the covers. She raised her knees and wrapped her arms around them.

She took a peek at her watch; it was almost time for her to go to the park. But she couldn't go. She wasn't ready; she needed time to prepare herself. Yes, she needed time. Maybe tomorrow she would go, maybe tomorrow…

She sat there, waiting for the time to pass, a voice inside her head taunting her.

_Coward... Coward... Coward…_


	2. Chapter 2

**This part is something I think COULD have happened after Taka left. The things I wrote here are pure fanfic.**

oOoOoOo

She walked into the park, determined, her steps purposeful and confident.

She wore a simple one piece yellow dress her mom had bought for her, a pair of sandals, and a hat with a red ribbon on it.

She felt pretty.

Her mom had seen her going out. Her eyes had popped wide and her mouth twitched. She looked like she had eaten a lizard, a very big one. Her mom asked her where she was going, but she ran away before her mom could stop her, before her courage left her. It was very satisfying to see her mom like that though; maybe she should wear dresses more often.

She looked around, trying to find any traces of Taka. She found none.

She wasn't surprised though, she had come an hour before their usual meeting time. She was anxious to get this off her chest, and so she went out earlier than expected. She wasn't excited, not really.

She walked around once, then chose a bench near the playground and sat. A few people were passing by and the park wasn't crowded, it was fairly sunny, most of the adults were probably indoors. There were a few kids around her age hanging around though, mostly boys, some of them were even staring at her, as if she had two heads or something! What was their problem?

She ignored them, concentrating instead on her toes.

oOoOoOo

She glanced at her watch. It was time.

She steeled herself and looked around. Her palms were getting sweaty, it was annoying.

A boy had approached her just a few minutes ago, asking her if she wanted to play with them. As if! Who did he think he was? She'd never hang out with those losers.

She recognized some of them. They were the same group who had bullied Taka a long time ago. She'd fought them together with Taka, and they won, against all odds they won. They had both ended up lying on the ground laughing afterwards. They've been friends ever since.

They didn't recognize her because of the dress, or because they were too stupid, probably both. She'd never hang out with them. Never.

She turned her head from left to right, her eyes jumping from boy to boy. She was a bit nervous now, and she wanted to run away and go back home. But she wouldn't. No, she would stay and wait for him.

What if _he_ didn't recognize her?

That would be silly. He would recognize her. He was Taka after all. But she would approach him first, just to be safe. She'd go to him, call him by his nickname, and tell him… tell him…

I'm sorry.

Yep, sounds about right.

She was never good at apologies, she was never sincere, never felt the need to, but she thinks one is in order.

She would apologize first. He would forgive her, she was sure of it.

oOoOoOo

He was late. He was never late.

She took a glance at her watch again, just to make sure.

Did something happen to him? Was he off on some errand? Maybe his dad asked him to buy the groceries or something.

She kept looking around anyway. The boys were saying their goodbyes to each other, done playing or talking about whatever stupid boys talked about. A few couples were lounging about, doing whatever gross things couples do. A few were walking their dogs, some of them were cute, and some butt ugly.

It was weird how she felt now though, at first she was nervous, embarrassed, and a lot of other things, but now she felt calm, even happy. She wanted to see Taka, wanted to see his reaction, she wondered what dumb look she'd get once he figures out the girl in front of him was his 'buddy'. She was looking forward to it…

She twiddled her thumbs while she looked at the passersby, sitting and waiting, smiling.

oOoOoOo

It was getting dark.

She wrapped her arms around herself, trying to ward away the chill.

It was almost 6. Her mom would be worried by now.

The people in the park were leaving one by one; probably heading out for dinner. A policeman was looking at her, a worried expression on his face. She would have to leave soon.

It looks like he won't come today. She'd have to come again tomorrow or maybe next week, and wear another stupid dress.

Odd how disappointed she felt. It almost hurt. Almost.

She sighed and stood up as she saw the policeman approaching. She didn't want to answer any of his questions.

She headed out for the exit, walking quickly. Like a criminal trying to leave the scene of the crime, trying her best to avoid attention.

She didn't feel pretty now.

No, she didn't feel pretty at all.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for the review Shadowgui! I'm pretty excited about the anime as well… though Yozora's voice kinda turned me off a bit. I hope they do everything right though, I expect to see a Yozora confession ending, I'm hoping it's not Sena just because she's more popular. And I hope we see more Bokutomo fanfics soon.**

**Aaaaand here's another short chap.. I'll probably wrap this up after 2-3 more chaps, I want to keep this simple and short. That way Yozora doesn't get too OOC.**

**This chap feels more like an extension of the previous one. I'll update as soon as I can. Sorry if there are mistakes in this one, didn't edit it much.**

oOoOoOoOoOoOo

She was an idiot.

A stupid stupid stupid idiot.

Why did she come here anyway? Why does she keep coming back?

She stood outside of the park this time. It was about time for them to meet. That is, if he came. And here she was, waiting, again.

She'd been waiting for him for 3 weeks now.

The policeman was watching over her. The boys were stealing glances at her, daring one another to approach her. They knew she'd snub them off, but they made a game out of it. They were all so annoying.

She should know better. She should give up. But it was hard. Taka was her friend. He was the only one she had. Her classmates were too… uninteresting. They tended to avoid her after talking to her. They said she was mean. It wasn't her fault that all the things they talked about were stupid. What was wrong with being honest?

Taka understood. He never pointed out her faults. He only laughed.

He was different. Or, at least she thought he was.

Maybe he found out? Maybe he saw her and walked away.

She bit her lip, angry. At herself, at Taka, at everyone.

Maybe he found someone else. Maybe he replaced her, with someone who was more fun to be with. Maybe they were watching her right now, laughing behind her back. Maybe they all were.

She clenched her fists, wanting to punch something, anything. She was pissed. She didn't want to stay there long.

But still, she waited.

She walked in after a while, this time heading for the play ground. She took her usual spot near the top of the metal bar obstacle course. Taking care she didn't slip, or expose herself, she was still wearing skirts. She was trying her best to get used to it.

Sitting at the top gave her a great bird's eye view of the whole park. This time, if Taka did decide to come, she would see him clearly, hopefully before he saw her.

It was lonely sitting there at the top, alone, with no one to talk to. The fact that she felt this way annoyed her greatly; she'd never been lonely before. She was a lone wolf. And she was never bothered about it. But now, it was different.

Darkness came too quickly as time passed by. She wasn't really expecting him to come anymore. But a part of her still wanted to hope. Somewhere, at the back of her mind, she knew he wouldn't disappear without a good reason. That he wouldn't leave her just like that.

"Sora." A worried voice calls out to her, breaking her from her reverie.

"Mom," she replied, a bit surprised, she never did tell her mom where she was always off to.

"Hi, I was grocery shopping, and I thought I saw you while I was passing by, so I came over and checked. What are you doing here? Are you alone? Get down, I don't want to crane my neck up while talking to you." her mom tells her, a somewhat concerned frown on her face.

Sora climbed down slowly, her skirt inhibiting movement. Once she had her feet planted on the ground, she gave her mom a smile and answered, "I was just waiting for something."

Her mom raised an eyebrow at her and gave her a look. She decided to push for details, "What something?"

"Just a friend." She replied casually, waving her hand in a gesture that spoke it wasn't important.

Her mom smiled at her though, and her eyes twinkled with amusement, "He's a boy, isn't he?"

"W-W-What makes you say that," she blushed, embarrassed "besides, it's none of your business!"

"You've been wearing female clothing for quite some time now, dear," her mom chuckled. "You've been really quiet lately too, not to mention moody. It has to be a boy."

"Whatever," she scoffed, turning away, she would not have this conversation with her mother. Her mom was embarrassing.

"So… is he coming? Can I meet him?" her mom teased.

"No, he won't come…not anymore."

Something in her tone must have caught her mom's attention. She stopped smiling and touched her shoulder. It was an awkward gesture, but it gave her comfort.

"Did something happen? Did you guys fight?"

"No, nothing like that, he just stopped coming, that's all, no big deal. Let's go home, Mom." She said, making an attempt to change the topic.

Her mom sighed and rolled her eyes; she gave her one of the grocery bags and proceeded to head towards the exit.

"Boys your age just don't understand girls."

"I wasn't acting like one."

"Maybe that's the problem."

They continued to walk silently afterwards. She didn't think that was the problem. Taka never had any problems with her attitude.

"If he doesn't like you for who you are, maybe you shouldn't like him." Her mom mumbled once they were halfway home. She stopped herself from correcting her. She didn't 'like' Taka. Not really.

"Okay, don't worry about it mom." She replied instead, just to stop her mom from worrying. She was done anyway. She wouldn't wait anymore. Taka left, that was all there was to it. The reasons didn't matter now.

She sniffed, her nose felt itchy, and her eyes stung. She scratched her face and continued walking, her mom giving her a pat on the shoulder.


	4. Chapter 4

**Aaaaand here's chapter 4! Sorry bout the delay… was too distracted by the hunger games and the night angel trilogy. Awesome books.**

**I have several versions of chapter 4 and I'm not really happy with any of them. I chose this because I felt this one was okay, if a bit disconnected. The last scene is a weird kind of way of showing yozora's desire to be normal. I'm not sure if I pulled that off correctly though. Lol. **

**And thank you,shadowgui and dimensionist, for dropping a review! **

**dimensionist - Kodaka did try to tell Yozora that he was leaving. It just so happened that on the day he planned to say goodbye, Yozora decided to come clean and tell Kodaka that she was female by wearing a dress. But! She was too embarrassed and could not go. Kodaka left the town without meeting Yozora (His father must've been in a hurry). Not sure which volume this was mentioned… I'm guessing 5… but that's how it is. :D**

**oOoOoOoOoOo**

Yozora headed straight towards her old seat, exhausted, but glad. The graduation ceremonies were finally over. It was the 2nd week of March, her last day in middle school and the official start of her spring break. A time she can spend alone with her books. A time she could spend away from the 'Normals'.

She smiled at the thought as she grabbed the bag she left in her classroom. As she walked towards the nearest exit, a nervous –but loud - voice calls out to her, halting her in her tracks.

"Mikazuki-san wait!"

Frowning, she turned towards her classmate, not making any effort to hide her annoyance. She was running straight towards her.

"Umm… Sorry… But me and the other girls are going to this ramen shop to grab something to bite, and then we might go to a karaoke bar or maybe to the arcade, and we kind of…" She said, panting.

"What do you want with me?" Yozora cut off, still frowning at the girl in front of her. It was the Class rep, her name… was something that started with an M. The girl did not annoy her - not as much as her other classmates do - she was mild mannered and shy, and Yozora didn't mind talking to her. She just wasn't in the mood to indulge her.

The girl blushed and looked down. She seemed to fidget for a while before she said, in a near whisper, "We thought you might want to come…"

Yozora's lips thinned as she pretended to consider her invitation. She didn't want to act too rude, she had no plans to accept the invitation, but she should give her classmate a reason.

The class rep seemed encouraged to see her thinking about the invite. She looked straight into her eyes before continuing. "We'll be in high school next term and some of our classmates might be leaving. So the girls and I decided to hang out while we still can. It'll be fun I'm sure. Maybe even the boys might come and join us. Why don't you come too Mikazuki-san?" she ended with a dazzling smile that could warm even the coldest of hearts. No wonder she was the class rep, the girl was gushing with charisma.

Yozora was not convinced though, in fact, it had the opposite effect. The girls probably meant all her female classmates and that meant half of the class. The thought of 'hanging out' with so many and socializing made her cringe inside.

It wasn't that she disliked her classmates - well, maybe most of them, but definitely not all - it was because she couldn't connect with any of them. To her, it was always as if she was on the outside looking in. During group activities, she was often chosen because she was smart and had good grades, not because she was friendly and easy to talk to. Her classmates tried to act friendly at first, but eventually they gave up. The walls she built around herself were too tall and too thick.

"I already have plans. I'll have to pass on your invite." She said, a bit more polite this time.

"But won't you miss out? Some of us might transfer to other schools and there's a chance we won't be able to see everyone together again. Won't it be sad to see a friend disappear without at least spending time before they go? To say goodbye to them when they do… " The class rep looks sadly at her, pouting.

Yozora narrowed her eyes. She was about to snap at her and tell her she didn't care for goodbyes when a memory of a certain blonde boy suddenly flitted on her mind. She calmed herself down and shook her head instead.

"I'm sorry but I really do have other plans." she said quickly, she ran towards the stairs before the class rep could stop her.

"Mikazuki-san! We'll be at Julian's at 5 o'clock! " was all she heard before she reached the stairs, she walked down, eager to leave the school premises and reach the comfort of her home. She found her mom near the entrance, talking with one of the teachers and headed straight towards her.

"Mom, I got my things, let's go."

"Oh okay, sure." Her mom smiled at her and then turned to her teacher. "Sensei, thank you for your time. I'll think about what you said later."

They went to the parking lot and got inside the car. Her mom turned on the engine but hesitated. Her mom looked at her contemplating something.

"Yozora, your teacher said a lot of good things about you and I'm very proud. But he mentioned something odd though…"

"Hm?"

They pulled out of the parking lot and into the streets before her mom continued. "Your teacher observed that you never talk to any of your classmates, that you've never showed any interest in joining any clubs. And that you tend to avoid participating in any extra-curricular activities. He told me that you kept to yourself and that you were always alone. He said it was almost like you had no friends in school. He sounded a bit worried. Yozora, is there something wrong?"

Yozora sighed and slumped into her seat. Having this conversation with her mother was appalling. That teacher should've just kept his mouth shut and mind his own business.

"Mom…" she said exasperated, "You know I'm not into those kinds of things. Most of the clubs bore me and I'm not really interested in sports or whatever. My classmates are annoying so I try to avoid them, but that doesn't mean I don't have any friends. I do have Tomo-chan." She whispered the last line.

"What? Tomo-chan? Have I met her?"

"Tch." She scowled, "She's from a different class and no, you haven't met her yet." She muttered, hoping her mom would lay off a bit.

"Oh okay then, you should invite her some time." Her mom replied.

Yozora suppressed her groan and mentally slapped herself. She imagined introducing Tomo-chan to her mother. She tried to picture out her mom's would be reaction. The look of surprise, understanding, followed by horror and pity would cross her mother's face. The image so vivid and painful she shuddered in her seat.

She turned her head away from her mom.

"Sure, I'll think about it…" she said.

Her mom drove on silently, no longer worried. They arrived at home about 20 minutes later. Before she could climb the stairs and lock herself in her room, her mom called out to her.

"Yozora, do you have any plans today?"

She stopped. We'll be at Julian's at 5 o'clock. "No."

"Uhuh, I'll be heading out in a while. I need to buy groceries. Is there anything you want?"

"Nothing, thanks."

Her mom waved at her and went to the kitchen. Yozora went inside her room, locked the door, and threw herself down on the bed. She stared at the ceiling, contemplating.

"You think I should go?" she whispered.

Tomo-chan shook her head.

"You're right… I'm not like these 'normals'."

Tomo-chan nods at her, smiling in approval.

Yozora took a book from her bedside table and continued reading where she left off. She wanted to distract herself; it was sometimes disturbing, the fact she could converse with an air friend. Tomo-chan was there to stop her from feeling lonely, a small part of her worried constantly about her sanity though, but she wasn't too concerned. Her imagination was just slightly over-active, that's all.

Tomo-chan sat beside her to keep her company. She would always be there. An imaginary comfort, but a comfort nonetheless.

Yozora looked at her air friend sideways. And for a moment, her face resembled the class reps.


End file.
